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Funny Poetrezine!

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Published by Duncan Flynn
Copyright © 2005 All rights reserved.

PO Box 1041 ~
Maleny, Queensland
4552 Australia

Phone: 0417 721 802

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Funny Poets web site - http://www.funnypoets.com

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Author, Editor-in-Chief & Publisher:

Duncan Flynn email@funnypoets.com

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FUNNY OF THE WEEK:

Three guys are debating which of their languages is
the most pleasing to the ear.

The Italian says, "Consider the phrase, 'I love you.'
In Italian, it is: 'Ti amo'. What a lovely sound!"

The French guy says, "True, but in French it is:
'Je t'adore'. An even more beautiful sound!"

"What's wrong with: 'Ick leiber dik," asks the German?

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FUNNY POEM OF THE WEEK

Intro:

This is a poem all about what it feels like when your
boyfriend moves into your life.

From the book Alternative Odes and it is featured
on http://www.laughterlines.net

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YOU KNOW HE'S MOVED IN WHEN...

Copyright; Liz Garrad

There are socks where there used to be carpet
There is noise where there used to be hush
There's something not nice in the toilet
and it just won't go down when you flush

There's a motorbike book on the table
and a girly mag inside the loo
how do readers wives keep their marriage alive
with a headboard in that shade of blue

There is permanent sport on the telly
in the bathroom you dare not take breath
because last night's curry returned in a hurry
and the perfume reminds you of death

When you go off to pee after midnight
you ask yourself if you've been wise
because God forbid he would lower the lid
and the porcelain's cold on your thighs

At the weekend you're stood on the touchline
freezing and dreaming of home
of a nice long hot bath, of the girls and a laugh
of like when you were living alone

But you gaze at his muscular body
and decide that he has certain charm
'til he spits and he snorts has a scratch down his shorts
and then wipes his nose on his arm

But still all this will be forgiven
because love is blind so it's said
and he might be a louse and a pig round the house
but he's like a prize stallion in bed

Copyright; Liz Garrad

http://www.funnypoets.com

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(or more) from poetry? You don't know where to start?

Find hundreds of tips and ideas from successful poets
in the exciting new e-book 'Earn a Full-time Income from
Part-time Poetry', compiled by Arcadia Flynn.

Omss, click here to find out more:

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