Funny Poem of the Week by FunnyPoets.com

a href='http://www.funnypoets.com'>FunnyPoets.com Your funny poem of the week is: Devote Your Life to Money! Oh, money, the life-giving juice of society! It brings us its blessings of every variety, It softens the blows that lifetime delivers, It favors the brave and it crowns achievers. It renders us free from oppression by jerks, From mockings, and putdowns, and scoldings,and smirks. It lets us buy tickets and travel away From where we're not welcome but are forced to just stay. From creditors' letters and big ugly urbs, From all that don't matter, from stuff that disturbs, To wide sandy beaches and azure blue waters, Away from the smoke of ten million motors. With money it all starts to fall into place- No longer respect is what you have to chase. It follows you like an afternoon shadow Thank money, it makes you a prince from a padow. With money, all people will treat you much better, As you are no longer society's debtor. Sweet smiles on you they will now bestow, Obsequious looks in their eyes then will glow. And women forgetting your age and your weight, Your looks and your height and your bald, shining pate, Will wink and remark how handsome you are For, in their minds, you are now a star. Oh, how pathetic society is! A "Miss" is now where there used to be "Ms." For quickly they learned that you've got all this dough, And then they appear from above and below. For freedom, for joy and enjoyment of senses, Don't waste precious time chasing empty pretenses. Just line up your pockets with luscious green money And soon you'll be hugging a cute Playboy bunny. As long as you're here on our green Earth, And want to be living in freedom and mirth, Devote your existence to dollar and pound For cash makes the world go smoothly around. Copyright; David Kessel View more funny poems at FunnyPoets.com-1 unsubscribe FunnyPoets.com 5646 Fairway Road Fairway, Kansas 66205

Last Chance: Poem in Your Pocket for Young Poets

	April 5, 2011 Members of the Academy of American Poets receive a 10% discount on all purchases in our Poetry Store. Simply use the code on the back of your membership card when ordering on our website. Not a member? Sign up today and we'll email you the special discount code. All sales benefit the Academy of American Poets, a 501(c)(3) nonprofit organization. For customer service, or to order by phone, call: (212) 274-0343		Today is the final day to purchase your copy of Poem in Your Pocket for Young Poets to receive it in time for National Poem in Your Pocket Day, April 14. This collection contains classic children's poems by Walt Whitman, E.E. Cummings, and Elizabeth Bishop, as well as poems by today's most popular poets, from Rita Dove to Naomi Shihab Nye. The detachable pages enable readers to select a poem they love, tear it out neatly from the book, and carry it with them all day to read, be inspired by, and share with family and friends. Order Now > Buy this new book for young poets with the original Poem in Your Pocket anthology, featuring 200 poems from Shakespeare to Sexton, arranged by theme—and receive an additional 10% discount. Learn more > Thanks for being a part of the Poets.org community. This is a special gift shop edition of the Poets.org Newsletter, just one of many programs from the Academy of American Poets. The Academy serves millions of people every year and depends upon the generous support of its members and donors. To remove yourself from the newsletter mailing list, click here. Academy of American Poets 75 Maiden Lane Suite 901 NY, NY 10038 academy@poets.org

eHow of the Day | eHow.com

eHow of the Day How to Look for Vintage Designer Clothing Shopping for vintage clothing can be an enjoyable and inexpensive way to nab fabulous designer clothing at a fraction of the price. If you know what to look for, you can spot a good buy among the throwaway garments and leave happy and confident that you have found a diamond in the rough. Vintage and thrift stores often carry valuable and rare designer items that you can't find anywhere else, short of an old relative or an estate sale. How do you know if the clothing you find is worth the marked price, or if its an inexpensive steal? Follow our guide to picking the perfect vintage items.…keep reading More Like This Care for Cut Roses How to Design for Small Spaces How to Make Scented Room Oil What Is Earth Day for Kids? New on eHow Donate Old Books Balance Mind, Body and Spirit Teach Children Good Oral Hygiene Create a Home First Aid Kit Backyard Garden Onion Flatbread

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[News] PIW 1 April 2011

PIW 1 April 2011

In our first issue of April, Croatian poet Nikola Petkovic considers, in three poems written in English while in the USA, how happiness intersects with displacement and separation from family, friends and home. PIW Germany presents the fragmented and experimental work of Daniel Falb, translated into English by Brian Currid and Christian Hawkey.

We also announce the names of the twenty guest poets who will be featured at the Poetry International Festival in Rotterdam this June!

Read the full editorial, poems and translations in the current issue of PIW at www.poetryinternationalweb.org

Poem of the Week

geodesic domes
Daniel Falb (Germany)

Clip of the Month

WAIT
C.K. Williams (USA)

 

PIW Archive Tour

Poetry and the city: A new tour exploring urban allegories and the imagery of the city in poems from the PIW archives. 

Poetry International Festival, Rotterdam 2011

The 42nd annual Poetry International Festival will take place in Rotterdam this year from 14 until 19 June. This year's theme is Order and Chaos, which will be explored in a number of special programmes focusing on poetry and literature, society and current events. See the full list of guest poets here.

 

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[Poetry Chaikhana] Wislawa Szymborska - A Contribution to Statistics

Here's your Daily Poem from the Poetry Chaikhana --

 

A Contribution to Statistics By Wislawa Szymborska (1923 - ) English version by Clare Cavanagh and Stanislaw Baranczak   Out of a hundred people those who always know better -- fifty-two doubting every step -- nearly all the rest, glad to lend a hand if it doesn't take too long -- as high as forty-nine, always good because they can't be otherwise -- four, well maybe five, able to admire without envy -- eighteen, suffering illusions induced by fleeting youth -- sixty, give or take a few, not to be taken lightly -- forty and four, living in constant fear of someone or something -- seventy-seven, capable of happiness -- twenty-something tops, harmless singly, savage in crowds -- half at least, cruel when forced by circumstances -- better not to know even ballpark figures, wise after the fact -- just a couple more than wise before it, taking only things from life -- thirty (I wish I were wrong), hunched in pain, no flashlight in the dark -- eighty-three sooner or later, righteous -- thirty-five, which is a lot, righteous and understanding -- three, worthy of compassion -- ninety-nine, mortal -- a hundred out of a hundred. Thus far this figure still remains unchanged.   -- from Poems New and Collected, by Wislawa Szymborska / Translated by Stanislaw Baranczak Amazon.com / Photo by byrne7214 /

============ Thought for the Day: It's not that we have to find the right place to look. It's that we have to find the right way to look. ============

Here's your Daily Music selection -- Budowitz Budowitz Live (Double CD) Listen - Purchase More Music Selections

 

Hi Omss -

I always knew statistics had a poetic heart. After such terrible abuse by advertisers and politicians, statistics will redeem themselves in great and painful art.

Of course, even the best-natured of statistics exist to taunt us, to challenge us. Then again, that's what those irascible poets do too...

==

Wislawa Szymborska (pronounced vis'wava sim'borska) was born in Prowent, Poland in 1923. When she was still a child, in the early 1930's, her family moved to Krakow.

When World War II broke out, Wislawa Szymborska was still a student, and had to continue her education in secret. Toward the end of the war she found work with the railroads, protecting her from being deported to the forced labor camps in Germany. She also found occasional work as an illustrator.

With the end of the war, she began her university studies, focusing on language, literature, and sociology. It was then that she connected with the Polish writing scene and published her first poems.

Because of difficult finances, she eventually had to drop out of school. She married in 1948 (and later divorced, in 1954). During this time she worked as a secretary and illustrator for a magazine.

With the rise of Soviet influence over Poland in the post-war era, Wislawa Szymborska, like many artists and intellectuals, initially embraced or, at least, accepted the new Soviet-style society. But she gradually distanced herself from official ideology which increasingly showed itself to be foreign-dominated bureaucratic totalitarianism and not supportive of the people. By the 1980s she was contributing material for underground samizdat publications in opposition to official ideology.

She spent much of her career as a columnist for a Polish literary review magazine, and many of her essays have been gathered together and published in book form.

In 1996 Wislawa Szymborska was awarded the Nobel Prize for Literature.

Although her poetry is loved throughout the world, she has published fewer than 250 poems.

Ivan


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